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Revenge Stories #91

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Revenge Story #91

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Many years ago in my college days (1979, actually) I was a freshman that ended up having to live in an upper-class dorm. Of course, I was the butt of a lot of jokes from the sophomores and juniors that lived there, since the lowly freshmen were all supposed to live in the freshman dorms. (The reason I was there in the first place was that I'd commuted the first quarter, and when I moved on campus the second quarter, there weren't any available rooms.)

Anyway, two of my neighbors in the dorm pennied me into my room one day. What's that? They take a lot of pennies and jam them into the gap between the door and the door jamb. By stacking 4 or 5 pennies in a couple of spots on the door, you can put enough pressure on the door that the latch simply won't open. I really appreciated being stuck in my room for most of a day until I finally got out. We laughed about it, and I simply waited.

A couple of weeks later it was snowing outside, and guys were having snowball fights. Our rooms were on the top floor of the dorm (4 stories tall) and the roof access wasn't locked. I went up on the roof while my neighbors were gone to class and leaned over the edge. By laying flat and reaching down, I could just reach their windows - which weren't locked. So I slid them wide open, and went back inside. I went to MY window, and hollered at the guys that were throwing snowballs. They thought it was coming from the room next door. So for about 20 minutes, all 10 guys did was through snowballs into through the open window. Beds, desks, papers and books were all covered in snow - and soaked.

Later in the spring, the guys threw me in the duck pond to get even (which actually put them one ahead), so I had to get them one last time. It's an oldie, but a goodie. I got a weather balloon and went into their room one day when they weren't there. (They were going down to meet one of their parents, and didn't lock the door when they left.) Poured about half a case of beer into the balloon, and started filling it up - IN their room. By the time it was fully inflated, the door was being pushed shut from the inside by the balloon. So they came back, finally pushed into the room (which took both of them) and made a serious mistake. They popped the balloon - which then spewed Little Kings all over the room, all over them - and all over the one guys parents.


(College revenge cannot be beat! You know what Carl, everyone says "revenge is a dish best served cold." You should try revenge with a scotch rosemary, a splash of Sherri, and a twist of lime. It is delectable.--


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